I haven’t posted in a hot minute, and it’s pretty clear I’ve lost traction. I used to post once a week, but it’s been months since I’ve done anything consistent. I’d like to put the blame on the fact that I’m taking a heavier load this semester, but the simple fact is I could be doing better.
One of the reasons I’ve failed is because I broke out of my routine. Last semester I had a large amount of free time every Tuesday, and I spent it in the library working on my blog. It wasn’t hard work – I liked writing and looked forward to it. I would fill up my tumbler from Jazzman’s Cafe, find a lo-fi playlist, and hide away in a corner of the library. I’d do my best to articulate my latest discovery or inspiration, and in doing so better understand it.
It’s hard to know why we stop doing things that make us happy. You’d think we wouldn’t need to worry about it, but we do. There will always be days where it’s easier to watch Netflix than work on a song, and even though songwriting will bring you joy, Netflix is easier in the moment. In the short term it’s inconsequential, but in the long term it makes you miserable. When I go a long time without creating, I’m just not as happy. Sometimes that unhappiness can cause me to sink into the things that caused it in the first place, but the cure requires an effort on my part. I have to get to work.